Secret Smile
by spacemonkeylover
Summary: Jack thinks about Sam's smile and their relationship or lack of, Sam thinks abotu Jack chpt2...Please R
1. Default Chapter

Just a little song fic that I thought would be appropriate for Jack and Sam.  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing, not Stargate or its characters or the song by the Semisonics.  
  
Spoilers: Children of the Gods and a season ten which I think they should make!!! Hint, hint (you can't end Stargate after only eight seasons!!!)  
  
Secret Smile.  
  
Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile and you use it only for me. Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile and you use it only for me  
  
There she is, standing across the room from me wearing a short red dress. That woman takes my breath away. She's talking to some guy I can't remember the name of, laughing...that's a false laugh if ever I saw one! I hope...  
  
So use it and prove it, remove this whirling sadness. I'm losing I'm bluesing, but you can't save me from madness  
  
These past ten years have been hard, losing Daniel God knows how many times, losing Janet and a lot of the staff at the SGC in the fight against the damn Goa'uld. There were times I thought I'd lost her, I would pull my hair out until I knew she was safe again. Those were the worst times, missing the person I love, seeing her with other men, she drives me crazy...  
  
Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile and you use it only for me. Nobody knows it but you've got a secret smile and you use it only for me  
  
Standing alone at the bar with my beer I remember how we first met, how that young feministic Captain walked into the room and captured my heart. Then she turned and caught my eye, she smiled, my smile and waved. Oh God, does she know what she does to me? I love her yet she is out of reach, damn what's-his-name! Paul, Patrick? Pete! Damn Pete!  
  
So save me, I'm waiting, I'm needing, hear me pleading. And soothe me, improve me I'm grieving, I'm barely believing it now, now  
  
I walk out of the room trying to control the urge to take her in my arms and kiss her. I waited too long to tell her that I needed her and now its too late, its killing me inside. Walking to my car I get in and drive the ten minutes back to my house, slamming the door and flinging myself on my bed like a sulking teenager-that's what she has tuned me into-a damned teenager!  
  
When you are flying around and around the world and I'm lying alonely  
  
Pitying my self in my room while she's partying with the rest of the SGC, I am so selfish. She is happier now than I have ever seen her before and I can't be happy with that. Then I remember her smile, my smile, the smile that she keeps for me, Pete never gets that smile. I grin as I lay on my bed thinking of her smile.  
  
I know there's something sacred and free reserved and received by me only  
  
There is always hope... 


	2. Faith of the Heart

For disclaimer and other stuff see 'Secret Smile'. Part two from Sam's POV.  
  
Faith of the Heart.  
  
It's been a long road, getting from there to here. It's been a long time, but my time is finally near  
  
Damn him! For eight years I have held myself back from reaching out for him. Eight long years!  
  
And I can feel the change in the wind right now. Nothing's in my way  
  
I only started seeing Pete because I thought it would help me get over him, finally move on from the out of reach...That didn't work!  
  
And they're not gonna hold me down no more, no they're not gonna hold me down  
  
I'm with the wrong man, not that I'll ever be able to get with the right man...oh screw the Regs! He's here tonight, in his well fitting tux, taking my breath away, maybe...  
  
Cause I've got faith of the heart. I'm going where my heart will take me. I've got faith to believe. I can do anything. I've got strength of the soul. And no one's gonna bend or break me. I can reach any star. I've got faith; I've got faith, faith of the heart  
  
I decided before coming out tonight that I wouldn't do anything stupid, even if that means getting slowly drunk with Daniel sitting in a corner somewhere. But seeing him now, I know I will, I'd tell him, tell him I don't want anyone else but him, that there has never been anyone else. Which is why I'm pretending to listen to Dr. Something-or-other explaining a theory or something while I scan the room...  
  
It's been a long night. Trying to find my way  
  
He sees me.  
  
It's now or never. I wave and smile at him. He...he turned to leave. Damn him!  
  
Been through the darkness. Now I finally have my day  
  
I wait for a chance to cut the scientist guy off and excuse myself. I can't believe he just ignored my like that! How dare he just walk out when he hasn't even talked to me yet? Walking after him I see his car drive off.  
  
And I will see my dream come alive at last. I will touch the sky.  
  
And they're not gonna hold me down no more, no they're not gonna change my mind  
  
I start the long walk to his house. So he's jealous of Pete, why shouldn't he be? Pete's lovely and all but he's...he's just not Jack! I have it bad; so bad I can't stand it anymore. I have to tell him tonight, tell him everything.  
  
Cause I've got faith of the heart. I'm going where my heart will take me. I've got faith to believe. I can do anything. I've got strength of the soul. And no one's gonna bend or break me. I can reach any star. I've got faith, faith of the heart  
  
Screw Pete, screw the Air Force, I just want to screw Jack O'Neill! Okay, there's his house, the hall light is on and his truck is parked in the driveway. I'm so nervous, cold, wind swept and nervous.  
  
I've known the wind so cold, and seen the darkest days. But now the winds I feel are only winds of change. I've been through the fire and I've been through the rain  
  
I knock on his door praying that he answers it-scared that he will.  
  
But I'll be fine  
  
A shadow moves in the doorway. He unlocks the door and opens it.  
  
"Carter, what are you doing here?"  
  
I'm frozen to the spot; I can't talk. Dammit!  
  
"Did you walk?" He asks looking for my car. "You didn't even wear a coat? God, Sam you must be freezing." I nod my head slowly as he pulls me in to his warm, cosy house. I lean into him to share his body heat; he's so warm.  
  
"Why did you come Sam?" He asked wrapping his arms around me freezing shoulders.  
  
"Well, maybe it's the alcohol talking but I have to tell you that I am in..." OMG!!! He's kissing me! Oh wow! His lips are so soft and his tongue is...wow!  
  
He pulled away to breathe. "That is exactly what I came for!"  
  
Cause I've got faith of the heart. I'm going where my heart will take me. I've got faith to believe. I can do anything. I've got strength of the soul. And no one's gonna bend or break me. I can reach any star. I've got faith  
  
I've got Jack!  
  
It's been a long road 


End file.
